Amanda Knox Seems Guilty Now

By Lex January 30, 2014 @ 12:19 PM

I’ve always been pretty certain that Amanda Knox was innocent of killing her British college exchange roommate. The Italian police claim that she was a drugged up sex fiend never made any sense. Good looking nymphomaniacs from Seattle only exist in Gus Van Sant films. And even then they’re hairless boys. Visit UW sometime and you’ll know why the prosecution scenario of crazed college girl sexual rumpuses seems like a reach. Except now, in trial number three or whatever the fuck number it is in the Italian justice system, the new prosecutor is ditching the sex games gone bad murder story line and switching to fight between chick roommates about a visiting boyfriend not flushing the toilet. And blammo. It’s all right there. The most believable female roommate murder scenario ever. I’m no doctor of jurisprudence, but I’m going to say that roughly 88% of all female homicides under 35 are the result of fights with their chick roommates over the bathroom. I don’t care if it’s the not picking up towels or the leaving of hair clumps or the borrowing of shit without permission. It’s something. You throw in the catty shit involved with the boyfriend visiting and not picking up towels or leaving the hair clumps or borrowing shit without permission and… murder two! Goodnight, Amanda.

Photo credit: Splash News

(2) Comments

  1. avatar
    Shastar 01/30/2014 17:09

    If she needs amnesty, I’ll be happy to give it to her. She can just stay in my bedroom, naked and wet.

  2. avatar
    Beylerbey 01/30/2014 20:47

    Greece and Italy, the grandmothers of the West, are now firmly in dementia.

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