Lamar Odom Will Dance With Bruce Jenner When He’s a Woman

Though officially thrown out of the Asgard that is the Kardashian compound, Lamar Odom is reportedly still in contact with former in-law Bruce Jenner. Lamar has told Bruce that he’s okie-dokie with the former Olympic gold medalist’s desire to become a chick. Khloe Kardashian’s ex thinks that Bruce Jenner should be allowed to shave down his Adam’s apple, get pig tails, and start taking in Khloe’s dresses to fit his Kiss of the Spider Woman physique if he so desires. This is America, God damn it! If grandpa wants to turn from a plasticine mutant male and into the world’s fuggliest female he should be allowed to do so. A source close to Odom says,

“Lamar encourages Bruce to stay true to whoever he is and or wants to be. He did tell him that living with that family and being with Kris [Jenner] was all about perfection and how surgery is a normal thing in her eyes.”

Lest you think Bruce is on the precipice ready to slice off his shlong, the Kardashian P.R. team is still pushing the dad is still a dad line:

“Bruce is a total dude, all he talks about are cars and motorcycles and sports. He still wears tracks suits and Adidas sneakers.”

That certainly sounds total dude. Whenever I see somebody in track suits and Adidas sneakers, I think to myself, there walks a man among twinks. Naturally no women or transgender male could possibly be interested in sports or motorcycles. They are consumed 24×7 with hormone shots and ridding themselves of unwanted facial hair. It sure sounds like Bruce is about ready to go bang a hundred skanky chicks like a rapey Roman gladiator. I’m sure Lamar would be cool with that too since he’s been doing the same since he left Khloe and his nut jar re-grew to normal size.