Once relevant Paula Abdul is suing a tanning salon for burning her legs and thighs back in 2012 when they were supposed to be burning her cellulite. It seems that the former entertainer head went to a the UVASUN tanning salon and had an infrared body wrap, which only sounds super safe. Apparently, they turned the oven on too hot and it scorched third degree burn sores on her once desirable flesh rather than dissolving her chub rub beneath. She alleges that they improperly used their human toaster which led to her getting extra crispy. I doubt that the lawsuit will go anywhere. Those places always make you sign a waiver before you climb into one of their cancer machines. Paula Abdul is ten years past getting any sympathy from a jury. Why not just opt for good old fashion liposuction? It’s only got a 20% kill rate. Or, you know, less booze and more jogging.