Carmen Ortega Has a Backup Plan

You may recall Carmen Ortega as the model who tried to get somebody famous in professional sports to knock her up before she gets old and unwanted. That narrows the list of part-time models in Miami down. She’s also the girl who got to know the true Justin Bieber by having a heart to heart talk with him in the backroom of a strip club in Florida. Jesus does find you in the silliest places. Arriving quickly at Plan C, Carmen is starting to take off more clothes in magazines like Alwayz Therro. You can go ahead and mock the magazine name yourself. You can’t knock Carmen’s thoughtful strategizing. Maybe LeBron won’t be calling back and you can bet Justin Bieber won’t remember your tits from the others he’s sucked on with his buddies, but pictures of yourself taking your clothes off is like pepper to medieval Europe or drug and disease free hummers at a David Geffen beach party, it’s currency.

Photo Credit: Always Therro Magazine