The world’s lamest girlfight ever continues. No hair pulling or boobs being ripped out of wifebeaters or even high-pitched screeching, as Miley Cyrus told Katy Perry that she better not be talking about which bitch has the dirty mouth.
Oh, snap, or some such shit like that. I’m kind of impressed Miley knew how to make the Twitter tongue emoticon. It’s shows she’s advanced past simple tools and utterances. Her trainers might even start saying, damn, that tomboy belongs in a school, not in a leotard with her rectum so pronounced in the air.
To show how serious she is about people not pre-judging her sexual habits, Miley Tweeted a photo of her new sex toy, a ginormous dildo in the shape of four-fingered hand. They say you’re not a real woman until you go ulna first on your secret garden forays with the Hand of Adonis. I’m not about to start judging what women jam up their lady parts, If I had a vagina, I’d have to use a mirror to see the TV set up my twat during NFL Sundays. If it felt good, it’s getting up in there. Still, I wouldn’t kiss Miley.
Photo Credit: Miley Cyrus/Twitter