Newman Is Still Alive

The rumors of Seinfeld actor Wayne Knight’s death have been greatly exaggerated. Over the weekend a bullshit fake TMZ website claimed that the dude who played Newman on Seinfeld had died in a traffic accident in Pennsylvania. Many Facebook messages were posted with people trying to out grief each other over the death of the tubby actor. Knight then took to Twitter to say that he is actually still alive. He Tweeted,

“Some of you will be glad to hear this, others strangely disappointed, but….I am alive and well! Does someone have to DIE to trend? Geez! Thanks for all the love everybody. I didn’t know you cared. Glad to be breathing!”

Knight is just the latest celebrity to have fake death reports circulating the web. Pranksters would choose Kim Kardashian or Paris Hilton, but you need somebody who isn’t revealing their deepest thoughts and taint photos on the Internet every ten minutes or else the ruse won’t get too far. So you pick somebody slighter lesser known who people haven’t heard from in a while. Like a sitcom actress from the 90’s or that kid you knew in high school who wore lots of Goth makeup and said they were moving to Belgium as soon as they could. Yeah, sorry, that guy’s not really dead. He’s back and working at FedEx-Kinko’s under the name Antonio.