FEMEN Moves Their HQ

Nothing says we are legitimately angry dikes quite like picking Paris as your new international headquarters. That’s exactly what the brave topless warriors of FEMEN have done, moving their yeast-filled Honeycomb Hideout from Maria’s stepmother’s basement in Kiev to one of the least appealing new sorority houses west of the Maginot Line. The girls couldn’t technically afford Paris, it’s more Paris adjacent, but it smells like Paris just the same. The French coppers found them rather immediately and donning their Battlestar Galactica gear, surrounded the place lest the girls start throwing tampons at the hommes sitting cross-legged nearby in the cafes. The place looks like one of the brothels beyond the majestic rues where you can still trade in your French Francs for girls with crooked spines and canker sores on their lips. That’s probably how they’ll lure in the men they feast on in the evenings while covering their small but flabby breasts with virulent slogans. Big score for France who’ve needed a good win since about 1720.

Photo Credit: Getty