Mila Kunis Won’t Reveal Anything About The Douchebaby (VIDEO)

By Travis May 09, 2014 @ 1:00 PM

Mila Kunis knows the gender of the baby that she’s currently expecting with Ashton Kutcher, and she also has a name picked out, but she won’t reveal any of those details because it’s none of our business or something. After all, her whole relationship with Ashton had been a secret for so long, even though everyone knew about it, so she’s going to keep everything to herself because she’s so brave, according to the monkeys that smacked their hands together in Ellen DeGeneres’ audience. Among the few things she did reveal was that she’ll be having a natural birth, probably because she wants to experience the most pain possible in squeezing 8 pounds of trucker hat out of her, and Ashton is learning Russian so they can raise a bilingual baby, and he can finally learn all of the terrible shit her father has been saying about him.

wwtdd

(2) Comments

  1. avatar
    Beylerbey 05/09/2014 19:50

    The only reason to learn Russian is to encourage Russian girls to defect via Radio Free Europe.

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