Celebrities Now Helping Kidnapped Nigerian Girls Through Silent Prayer

Back in early May, celebrities scrambled to emote support for the Nigerian school girls kidnapped by militant Islamic community organizers. Just look at Ellen’s eyes. Those are the same eyes she gives to Portia when panties not her size fall out of Ellen’s pant suit pockets during laundry Thursdays. That’s real remorse.

Coming out against kidnapping and child rape and slave trafficking was a bold stance for many in Hollywood to make, but damn if they didn’t go in whole hog without fear of consequence. But all the celebrity hashtagging in the world it seems couldn’t bring back the girls. Then time passed. Like hours and even days and everybody who had invested a couple minutes of their time to save the girls lost hope or had nail appointments. Plus there was Cannes. It was just really bad timing for the girls in terms of their kidnapping.

Congresswoman Frederica Wilson is now Tweeting the shit out of every celebrity who demanded something be done back in May then sort of stopped. Which would be everybody. Except for Sean Penn who air-dropped himself into the Nigerian hinterlands with nothing but a week’s worth of Ramen and some HGH suppositories. I think you call this shaming. Fuck, I have to compliment somebody from Congress. It’s worth it. You don’t have to care, but if you’re going to act like you do, then don’t be surprised if somebody like Fredrica calls you on your shit.

Photo credit: The Ellen Show/Twitter