Selena Gomez Has Found Her Motto

Selena Gomez perfectly captured her generation’s mantra in a new tattoo, which reads Love Yourself First. It was translated from an Arabic phrase, because translating common phrases from a foreign language is a good way to make idiotic tattoos seem exotic. Tats also serve to advertise your global spirituality while not requiring you to actually read a book or even a lengthy pamphlet. Being a Muslim seems cool but I’m not fucking reading the Quran when I still have three more Harry Potter books to go.

I was curious as to who Gomez considered the star of her solar system ever since her new porn star tits blocked the pop ups on my web browser. I remember the golden rule about loving others like you want them to love you. This Love Yourself First axiom is just a slight celebrity twist on that old standard. Though it’s also possible it was incorrectly translated from Arabic and the phrase is actually supposed to read, Death to Israel, Falafel half price before 5pm. Yeah, that was kind of racist

Photo Credit: Instagram