Adam Levine’s Wife Is Still Alive

Ten days seems like a long time to be married to Adam Levine. You’ve got to be cursing the damn environmentally sound sun oven in your designer kitchen which will only bake your head slowly on cloudless days. Women don’t like messy exits. Poison, suffocation, watching The View until your medulla oblongata melts. Now that women’s magazines can no longer speculate about the dating or the marriage, they’ve turned their attention to asking Prinsloo about making babies. Blessed to be born naturally dumb, the Victoria’s Secret model doesn’t require the services of a public relations agent to empty up her responses:

I have no expectations. Not in a bad way, but I’ve learned that you can’t plan ahead. I live day by day and see what happens. It’s vague, but I like it that way.

It’s that vagabond throw caution to the wind mentality that led Prinsloo to marry People magazine’s sexiest sex pot man alive who also happens to be worth about $50 million. That was pretty randomly day by day fortunate. I give them another ten days, unless she does get pregnant, then twenty.

Photo Credit: Victoria’s Secret