Britney Spears Had a Shitty Day (VIDEO)

By Lex August 29, 2014 @ 9:22 AM

Britney Spears’ boyfriend David Lucado was caught on tape dancing and making out with a woman who was somebody else’s chubby girlfriend. The Britney Spears conservancy, also known as Britney’s dad’s rent money, is spinning the story that they reached out to the ‘agency’ holding the tape and bought it from them for safe keeping. This arrangement used to be called extortion, now it’s all done with lawyers and contracts and paid leaks to TMZ. Before daddy secreted the video in a remote cavern in Costa Rica, he made Britney watch it while he stood in the background with a sinister smile and twirled his mustache. One less claimant on his daughter’s money to worry about. Britney immediately contacted Lucado and told them their year long relationship was over. Poor fuck, he was probably set up.

As always, Britney turned to her three million fans on Instagram to let them know she was having a bad day. The onslaught of heart shaped emoticons and inspirational Pablum lifted Britney’s spirit. Britney’s been thrown off this horse before. She’ll rebound after a month of Nilla wafers and trying to remember where she left her kids.

(4) Comments

  1. avatar
    BillyMitchellisaGoldenGod 08/29/2014 09:46

    Hopefully the next video will be of Britts beating down a paparazzi with an umbrella after shaving her head bald. I miss bald Britts.

  2. avatar
    MacDaddy 08/29/2014 11:06

    I’ll happily F*ck the memory of him out of her.

  3. avatar
    LEE 08/29/2014 11:20

    Oh pound Britney. Pound her hard and long.
    For who in the hell are yah gonna pound.
    When Britney’s dead and gone.

  4. avatar
    miche the killer 08/29/2014 13:41

    Apparently, not shitty enough to cry off those dumb ass eyelashes…

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