Jessie Nizewitz Sues VH1 For Broadcasting Her Ginormous Twat

By Lex August 22, 2014 @ 11:56 AM

Jessie Nizewitz On VH1's 'Dating Naked'
At some point VH-1 figured out that modern music sucked and the good money was in never underestimating the stupidity of the TV viewing audience. Now they churn out a shit mill of heavily staged, lowest common denominator reality shows designed to make people think they’re watching something shocking. Dating Naked is one of their most noteworthy turds. Take the classic phony dating show and have all the bachelors and bachelorettes be naked. Only, we have to blur out all the nude parts because we still need to sell Kellogg’s ads. Tony the Tiger don’t go for bare twat. Only the Temple of Doom slave kids back in post-production tasked with blurring out cocks and vaginas and tits for hours on end missed the ginormous peach hole of Jessie Nizewitz. (You can see the uncensored gaper HERE, NSFW rules apply, naturally).

Jessie’s suing for big bucks to make her feel whole and less of a sideshow freak again.

My grandma saw it. I saw her this week and she didn’t have much to say to me. She’s probably mad.

Fuck, that’s worth at least five million right there. You couldn’t possibly expect that one of the unintended consequences of filming yourself playing on the beach naked for dozens of hours would ever result in the world seeing your uncovered blowhole. Jessie also mentions that the guy she was seriously dating dumped her after her brilliantly large orifice was errantly broadcast. She blames his jumping ship on the public shame. But we men know better. No dollars for that, Jessie. Especially since you just blew the ruse of being single and on a dating show looking for a boyfriend.

Photo Credit: VH1

wwtdd

(4) Comments

  1. avatar
    Admiral 08/22/2014 17:34

    Breach of contract? Yeah, she should probably sue for that. But that’s not going to give her dignity back. When the world can tell you’re stretched out from too much screwing… you don’t come back from that.

  2. avatar
    scallywag 08/23/2014 10:22

    Kids, is there something cynical and aghast about Jessie’s comments here? On one hand Jessie is horrified that the world got to see her crotch but on the other hand she was fine with traipsing about in the buff live on set for you and me to imagine to our heart’s content. Yet what might be more stifling is if Jessie Nizewitz is so offended by the resulting image, surely she must have had an inkling of an idea going to the nypost to talk shop about her crotch shot would only lead to every 17 year old boy in the Northern Hemisphere quickly googling Jessie Nizewetz crotch shot….

    http://scallywagandvagabond.com/2014/08/nsfw-jessie-nizewitz-dating-naked-reality-star-sues-over-crotch-shot/

  3. avatar
    Shastar 08/24/2014 12:35

    $10 says she’ll be naked in Playboy or Penthouse within the year, showing off her twazzer, and talking about how violated she felt on one page, How liberating and empowering being naked in front of the camera is on the second, and how she had an impromptu orgy and blew half the cameramen on the last night of filming on the third.

  4. avatar
    Maybe_Observer 08/25/2014 09:35

    Luckily there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that this is a staged publicity stunt for this awesome TV show.

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