Ashley Judd Can’t Afford Bras

If you’re like me, you’ve been waiting patiently for Dolphin Tales 2, the sequel to the film about one plucky little girl or boy, I can’t remember, who helps rescue a cute as fuck dolphin who lost its tale to the Gorton’s Fisherman’s hook. As with all her roles of the past decade, the actress whose face used to look like Ashley Judd played the single mom trying to do right by her kids. Transitioning into the mom in crappy animal movie roles might be a blow to Ashley’s leading lady ego, but that doesn’t give her the right to flash her unchecked breasts to the kids. The sight of unfettered tits turn young people into rapists and polluters. Even the dolphin whose tale they hacked off again in time for the sequel was making annoying high pitched whistles in distress. We can eat the dolphin to make it shut up. But we can’t eat the children. Get yourself a bra, Ashley. Save those nipped and tucked bad boys for an evening affair.

Photo Credit: Splash