Kim Kardashian Is the Big Sister You Wish You Had

There’s no prouder moment for an attention starved whore than when you get to watch your half-sister by way of your tranny stepdad take her first steps on a runway in Paris. Naturally, you can’t support your familial whoreling without ten hours of hair and makeup and a dress that reminds the wealthy men in the audience they can’t plow their uncircumcised cocks through Kendall’s tiny fashion model titties.

Kris Jenner intentionally built a healthy dose of competition among and between her surgically enhanced offspring. Sort of like the Jack Harbaugh did with his sons in football. You can be friends in the offseason but when the whistle blows in a Niners-Ravens game, you’ll fratricide the shit out of your childhood bunk-bed mate. I’m not saying Kim would shank her younger sister if she ever felt she was a threat. Poison seems more like Kim’s dark calling.

Photo Credit: Splash