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September 19, 2014 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston | 0 Comments
Dani Reardon is known in internet circles at Little Monstar, and worshiped by a contingent of men who like chicks with huge guns and well defined abs and delts. This sexual preference is often abbreviated as gay. Reardon kicked the shit out of her boyfriend, uprooted a bunch of plants, cracked the windshield of a truck by hand, and was then put into a patrol car where she repeatedly bashed her head into the cage in the back seat. Reardon was apparently drunk, which can happen quickly when you survive on syringes full of Captain America serum and powdered eggs and throw back a fifth of Scotch because its low in carbs. It’s likely whatever Reardon is doing to juice her pythons is enlarging her frontal lobes and unleashing a violent beast on the Florida outback. I recommend you think twice before dating any chick with hands the size of pomelos, and if you are sexually curious just have a go at Neil Patrick Harris. He’s a funny guy with great stories about the Emmy’s as opposed to that time he added gravel to his oatmea and then spent nine hours lifting at Gold’s.
Photo Credit: Instagram
Photo Credit: Instagram