Peyton Manning’s A Munchie’s Genius

September 19, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston | 0 Comments

Peyton Manning suggested his twenty-one Colorado Papa John’s restaurants are pulling in a ton of dough because weed is legal in in the state now and pot heads can’t resist super shitty pizza places that deliver and take coupons. Manning bought the franchises two weeks before Colorado legalized recreational marijuana. Manning threw in a wink to the pot culture because he was wearing his bad boy underpants:

“I’ve gotten to know some of the folks here in Colorado… There’s some different laws out here in Colorado. Pizza business is pretty good out here, believe it or not, due to some recent law changes. So when you come to a different place, you’ve kind of got to learn everything that comes with it.”

Someone should tell Manning that Colorado also legalized use of the word weed so he doesn’t need to use a ton of euphemisms. This guy probably still hems and haws when suggesting a blow job. I find his inference that all users of marijuana are lovable washouts who stuff their face with five dollar pizzas rather offensive not to mention right on point. Just like on the field. He read the defense, saw 500,000 dudes in hemp pullovers smiling wryly and rubbing their bellies and bought up two dozen pizza outlets in their delivery zone. He’s probably making more money off weed in Colorado than most of the pot outlets and his hands are completely Southern Boy clean. Fucking genius.

Tags: peyton manning