Piers Morgan Finally Goes Away

By Matt September 03, 2014 @ 7:42 AM


Piers Morgan is no longer employed by CNN. After taking over for Larry King, Morgan saw the show’s ratings tank because the change of face suddenly made people realize they had actually been watching Larry King stumble through interviews for the past 80 years. Morgan’s show focused on his hatred of guns and dental floss and also regularly devoted time to issues such as what type of tampon Miley Cyrus is currently endorsing. Before taking over for King, Morgan was considered a joke in Britain where he broadcast and published gossipy trash that makes TMZ look like Pulitzer material. He was mostly known in the U.S. as the drunk looking winner of Celebrity Apprentice. The geniuses at CNN figured they should make that knobby headed boob one of the faces of their network while praying or the U.S. to launch another war in Iraq. Shockingly it went awry. Morgan is one of those guys who simply won’t go away so expect to see him taking a paycheck from some channel a notch or two below CNN. That doesn’t leave much. Maybe that Channel Al Gore sold to ISIS to air their beheadings.

Photo Credit: Getty ImagesĀ 

(2) Comments

  1. avatar
    DrainBammage 09/03/2014 08:40

    >make that knobby headed boob one of the faces of their network

    No, its ‘knobby headed boob WITH a british accent’.
    You can be biggest inbred retard in England but come to America with that accent and the airways are yours.
    ESPN has been flogging the scottish version of Don Cherry (but not as gay) called Tommy Smyth for decades because they figure he has to know something because he has an accent (never mind that scottish or english players/coaches are not wanted by anyone on the planet but the old colonies.)
    I wonder if french speaking colonies and most of central and south america (as well as Brazil) has such awe and fascination about how the language is spoken in the lands of their colonial masters.
    Do Peruvians HAVE to have media personalities with a Madrid accent?
    Does Jean Guy in Djibouti and Ti-Cul St.Pierre in Quebec think that the Parisian accent is ‘better’?

    >from some channel a notch or two below CNN

    I have them below TMZ for accuracy. Heck, even for journalism. So your basically saying what? Fox? Food Network?

  2. avatar
    Beylerbey 09/03/2014 10:02

    It’s funny to me that people think limeys are smart because of that stuffy, highborn accent. I’ve always thought it sounded anemic and effete, like you could snap the speaker in two with a thought.

    Recall that one of the best pieces of investigative journalism of the last decade was the Enquirer exposing John Edwards’ philandering. A tabloid did that; none of the other “legit” sources was anywhere near it. I expect this will endure, as I don’t expect journalists to stop being scum any more than I expect basketball players to stop being black.

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