Small Dick Guy Branches Out

By Matt September 03, 2014 @ 7:59 AM

Comedian Patrick Moote has found minor celebrity after releasing Unhung Hero, the documentary about his small penis that you constantly see promoted on Netflix and squint your eyes to blur out. Moote was publicly rejected when he proposed to his girlfriend on a Jumbotron at a UCLA basketball game. He claims his girlfriend turned down his proposal because he has a small dick. If you look at the video and you’re above eleven, you’ll notice how fake and staged it looks. Then he kind of built a whole media campaign around being the guy with the dick too small to be loved. Most comedians search long and hard before deciding on a schtick, but Moote was apparently born with his. I guess it’s more endearing than having a monster cock and being the dick braggart, though I’m still not sure I’d bank my career on my baby peen. His new web series is about shitty puns he makes up, because that’s the kind of thing guys with itty weens do. I would recommend watching it if you ever need a boost to your self esteem by imagining how happy his girlfriend would be to fuck you.

wwtdd

(3) Comments

  1. avatar
    Beylerbey 09/03/2014 09:50

    “Most comedians search long and hard before deciding on a schtick…”

    Don’t think for a second that you’re getting extra points for this. It was practically was obligatory.

  2. avatar
    TheAlchemist 09/03/2014 10:15

    It was practically was eh?

  3. avatar
    Beylerbey 09/03/2014 11:23

    Pre-coffee moment.

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