Tits Are Still Profitable

For those unfamiliar with mid market shit factories, Twin Peaks is a great chain restaurant. That’s assuming you’re looking to score a boner and diarrhea. Originally it was created as a rival to Hooters, which tends to favor seniority and maternity leave potential over breast to hip ratio when it comes to selecting the girls to don the orange dolphin shorts. Twin Peaks has taken a different approach, and solely employs hot young dumb ass. I mean that as a compliment. It’s a true meritocracy based solely on physical attraction and not your server’s ability to work a pitcher or even speak traditional english. The formula seems to work. The chain’s locations have proven highly profitable. It turns out lame dudes who will never get a foot in the door with the chick dripping her pussy shavings onto some nachos are lining up around the block in support of tits and processed cheese. Twin Peaks is now one of America’s fastest growing chains. Maybe this will change once lawsuit trolls sue the shit out of them for not hiring Chaz Bono’s fiancee. Until then I highly recommend grabbing a drink or two on your way to a superior restaurant at your next Tulsa area sales convention.

Photo Credit: Facebook