Artist Makes Bad Art For Bad People

Ashley Longshore specializes in creating ‘family portraits’ for the one percent of people financially capable of commissioning her work without immediately regretting their decision. Typically these families are looking for masturbatory allusions to their unhealthy obsession with greed and materials, hence the title of her new series, “Greed, Money and Status.” It’s unclear how Longshore attained her position in the high end art world but it more than likely sprang up from sitting through conversations with art school graduates bitching about how they can’t afford the new J. Crew line. That combined with an insecurity complex and a wealthy husband and you’ve suddenly got Gwyneth Paltrow standing in your art studio with her checkbook open. Of Longshore’s more recent pieces is a chair stuffed with $500,000 dollars in shredded cash, because it’s ironic not to eat your peas while kids starve in India.

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