Ariana Grande Has Weird Stalker

Some pasty dude named Tim Normandin has sent Ariana Grande the following gifts: A forty pound pumpkin, candles, kitty cat calendars, a set of mirrors from K-Mart, and jewelry that cost him a full month of lunch money allowance from mom. Instead of curt but sweet thank you card, Grande has contacted law enforcement who have warned Normandin to cease and desist the Travis Bickle as Santa Claus routine. Normandin has remained defiant. I’m three levels of education away from being a lawyer, but buying people gifts certainly can’t be illegal. Americans still enjoy the freedom to express our religious beliefs and shower young media composed tarts with bullshit they order online while masturbating. Grande really needs to work on her attitude of gratitude. Years from now while married to an emotionally abusive husband she will look back on Normandin as the one who got away. Or they’ll find bodies in his crawl space. Only time will tell.