Bella Thorne Also An Author

Teen stars have always had book series with their names and faces on them. It’s a more recent phenomenon where we pretend these TV twits are actually penning the tween novels. Ghostwriters have been getting IP ass raped since the invention of the feather tip pen. That’s the life they choose. What’s more curious is why instead of just saying these girls love this book series and putting their Seventeen magazine mugs on the covers, they insist on crafting a mythology of these pretty faces being authors of any caliber. As a writer of dubious caliber myself, I think I’m offended.

AUTUMN FALLS is the first book in Bella Thorne’s new series! It has everything readers will love and relate to: a real girl trying to find her own inner strength and be the best she can be, with a hint of magic and mystery, and a steady stream of OMG-I-can’t-believe-that-just-happened fun.

That certainly sounds relatable and empowering and the exact formula of every single tween novel series ever. The perfect stocking stuffer for the girl in your family you want to guarantee never challenges herself in the hard sciences.

Bella Thorne is the last great hope for her stage parents dream of having at least one heavily molested daughter bank a decent paycheck in Hollywood. Her older two sisters gave it their best shot and are now seen mostly in topless photo shoots on social media. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But it’s not paying down the mortgage on the family home in Florida. Back to the Starbuck’s to pen your next book, Bella. Daddy needs more hints of magic.

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