Justin Bieber Continues Spiritual Quest

Justin Bieber met with a rabbi for three hours because those guys are really nice and generally bored and will talk to anyone for three hours or a year. He then hopped in a Rolls Royce and went to Spago like a guy in an 80’s movie who hits it big when his rich uncle dies. Bieber’s manager is appropriately Jewish and Bieber says he now says a Christian and a Jewish prayer before he performs to the culturally bankrupt with a bunch of skanks in booty shorts. It’s unclear how his quest to ‘learn to spread the word of God’ is going to manifest itself. My guess is an exceptionally shitty and gimmicky pan-spiritual album destined to be played around campfires while ten year olds get high on glue and talk about how cool Bieber’s misdemeanors are. You know, Justin, the best way to get closer to God is to go see him for yourself. Use the warm tub, you’ll barely feel the cut.

Photo Credit: Instagram