I didn’t think Simon Cowell would stick with his buddy’s wife he knocked up for almost a full year now since she shat out his spawn. But there they are in Barbados with the little bastard, her other son from her marriage tucked safely away in boarding school on the most remote islet of Tierra del Fuego. Only in the movies do relationships originated in sin and deceit lead to horrible outcomes. In real life, you get Caribbean vacations and cute as a button kids who make for wonderful magazine covers. Though I wouldn’t try this at home unless you’re pretty fucking rich.
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