Kim Kardashian Trailblazes

Kim Kardashian’s soon to be released book of selfies entitled Selfish just picked its cover image. The final choices were tits, ass, and a photo of Kim working with disabled children, all of which were progressively more fake. They went with tits after market testing showed that for the past ten million years people have loved tits. According to the publisher, Satan, this book is going to contain some never before seen Kim Kardashian selfies. Just enough to cream to, not enough to fall in love.

Widely regarded as a trailblazer of the ‘selfie movement’ — a modern-day self-portrait of the digital age — Kim has mastered the art of taking flattering and highly personal photos of oneself. For the first time in print, this book presents some of Kim’s favorite selfies in one volume— from her favorite throwback images to current ultra-sexy glam shots— and provides readers with a behind-the-scenes look into this larger-than-life star.”

Then they called Kim Kardashian the modern day Marilyn Monroe because it’s more flattering than calling her a modern day piece of chewed up gum the world is trying desperately to scrape off its shoe. I’d mock this inanity more but then Kim would just show me how she scored another twenty million from the moderately retarded underclass and she’d pee on my shoes while screaming Payless and rubbing her clit with a live mink.

Photo Credit: Twitter/Instagram