Scientology Rights Wrongs

Say what you will about the Church of Scientology being an exploitive cult which engages in blackmail, forced forever labor, and child abuse, because all those things are likely true, but you can’t deny they have a solid Public Relations Department. Two Papa John’s drivers brought over $2000 worth of pizzas to the Scientology Center and weren’t given a tip. Zero. Not even an 8 x 10 glossy of John Travolta’s masseuse having his balls colored in space paint. Nothing. Then someone involved posted the receipts online and people shrugged since this does not make the SportsCenter highlight reel of fucked up shit the Church of Scientology does.

Not surprisingly the Church made up for it by sending the restaurant a $300 tip, after TMZ put the story up. The Church is now busy determining who posted the receipts and sitting outside their apartment in an unmarked van so they can hack their email and find some out of context bachelor party photos. At that point they’ll invite you to a meet and greet where it will be determined you need auditing. First session, $300 bucks. Give it back. You don’t want this kind of heat.