Sly Stallone Doesn’t Stop

Sylvester Stallone will star in another Rambo movie and play Rocky Balboa once more in a spin-off movie due out in 2016. Rocky came out in 1976, making it forty years of Stallone playing the same character. It’s hard to knock him, either because he’s successful and has a hot model wife or the jokes about how he looks like the Mom from a bodega aren’t funny anymore. You have to admire his commitment to acting. Or to just to not coming up with any new ideas. Now that I think about it, a lot of successful people are just persistent and annoying.

Is the Rocky character really that engrossing? People were drinking beer with little triangular pull-tabs on the cans back in ’76. They didn’t know what was cool. Rambo’s entire personality is just that he kills Gooks. He’s like Mark Wahlberg with access to guns. Far as I know that war is over. I’ll probably see both movies on the one percentile chance they won’t both be hastily thrown together money grabs produced by the Emirates. Then I’ll do the same decades later when a ninety year old spry looking Sly reprises his role in Party at Kitty and Stud’s and jizzes his Viagra induced seed all over a chick with a perm for $5.99 on Youtube. Actually someone write up that script on a cocktail napkin. It would be hilarious and I’m almost sure he’ll do it. For the right price. Tell him this internet thing is really catching on.

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