Floyd Mayweather Gay for Luggage

Contrary to popular belief not all dudes express themselves through uncontrollable consumerism are gay. Some are just real dumb and want to prove to the companies selling them overpriced garbage that they have enough money to afford it. You can be well dressed and straight. Baggage is where you draw the line. No matter how a man might dig designer shoes, a straight guy doesn’t buy luggage. Or big ass purses or whatever the fuck these are.

Gay dudes literally stuff new luggage into their luggage when they visit Milan. It’s how you tell a retarded narcissist from a guy who likes cock. Straight guys will live in a cat shit ridden apartment but spend all their money on Louis Vuitton so they can go to clubs and look like rapists. Gay guys dress smart but also care about the centerpiece on the dining room table and coordinate their keychains with their sunglasses. If you buy man purses don’t pose proudly with them on Instagram. Instead hide them in the closet with your repressed sexuality. They’re all just pretending to like you.

Photo Credit: Instagram