Claudia Jordan in A Bikini

I mostly remember this chick from Deal or No Deal, the show you watched just waiting for Howie Mandel to bring a gun and start mowing people down suitcase holders to terminate their microbial afflictions. She’s also now on one of those Real Housewives shows even though she’s not a housewife, a wife, or real so much. Nobody cares anymore about titles or truths. Those are bygone days. Can you give men wood into your 40’s. That’s why Jordan’s at the beach and you’re at work. She isn’t crying about people saying means things to her on Twitter. She’s letting the Atlantic ocean massage her crackers and wondering how she’ll look that night getting out of a Lambo. That’s real power.

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