Steve Francis Lost His Necklace

I can think of two reasons not to wear a giant gold chain. One, you’re a man. Men don’t wear jewelry because men don’t need to be pretty. Second, somebody’s going to rob you. Steve Francis, formerly a pain in the ass of the NBA, was at a rap show in Houston just getting sticky and some dude tried to jack his chain.

The giant gold rope didn’t break at first and turned into a makeshift hangman’s noose. While wearing a giant chain you never know when you’ll be the victim of an impromptu strangulation but you can be pretty sure you will look fucking stupid. The guy got away with the chain and hasn’t been caught even though he’s caught on camera. Perhaps law enforcement figures if you adorn yourself with a giant chunk of precious metal and step foot into a den of wasted welfare recipients you’ve got what’s coming to you. Francis didn’t even call the cops because they’ve got a dozen dead hookers stuffed into recycling bins down in Kirby and you were kind of asking for it. Let me show you the back page of the newspaper. This is the stock market. Invest in something you don’t wear or drive.

Photo Credit: TMZ/Youtube