Wu Tang Clan Low on Gas

Wu Tang is releasing an album kind of. It is titled Once Upon A Time In Shaolin and there is only one copy of it in existence. The album has been kept in a locked box. It was seized by customs at JFK airport because there was no key to open the box. It was then scanned and found to contain some tracks which didn’t make the cut on previous albums. It will be sold to the highest bidder, which starts at five million dollars. Or you could take that money and hire Raekwon to be your personal chef and butler. Your college buddies will love it the first day. Then it will get weird. The album will remain under copyright for 88 years, meaning you won’t be able to hear it, which is not a glowing endorsement. The whole thing is utterly retarded. The Wu are now annoying hipsters you don’t want to throw McDonald’s refuse at from your moving vehicle lest you be sprayed with a Tec-9. I’ve already forgotten about this. Try harder.