Kim Kardashian Gets Earth Day

There’s something comforting in never having to wonder what the whore is planning. It’s whore stuff. Mollusks have more complex agendas than Kim Kardashian who posted a photo of herself in a bikini against a green backdrop to honor earth day while pushing her book of selfies.

In honor of Earth Day here is my best plant selfie from my new book #Selfish coming out May 5th!

The exclamation point seems a bit much. The damaged clanswomen who exchange their colored beads for your book don’t need prodding to seal their position as bottom rung on the mental food chain. The entire point of Earth Day is to sell somebody on something. Kim showing off her tits in front of a bush isn’t any more cynical than Governor Brown forgetting to mention that I can no longer wash my balls because we need more almond milk for the anti-vaxxers in Santa Barbara. Everybody’s lying on Earth Day. Kim had the decency to show off her tits. That’s called a mitigating factor. Buy her book and complete the circle. I’m moving to Seattle where the are no televisions.

Photo credit: Kim Kardashian/Instagram/Elle France