T-Pain Commits Cardinal Sin

T-Pain not so considerately joked that Robert Pattinson had proposed to the over accessorized avatar who calls herself FKA Twigs. A tear ridden conversation no doubt ensued once she heard the news as she proceeded to continuously ask if this was because of her thighs. There are a few things in life you don’t do. Joking about marriage or asking a chick if she’s pregnant are two of them. She’s not and now you have to scratch your eyeballs. T-Pain joked in a recent interview:

“She’s engaged now… to ol’ Patty [Robert Pattinson]. I don’t know if she wanted anybody to know that …”

T-Pain is a cock block. Watch for him to bring up the stripper you fucked in Reno over Thanksgiving turkey in front of your in-laws. He later clarified that he is just a bored asshole:

“Added a little #AprilFools to my interview.”

It’s marginally funny to tell your kids they’re adopted on April Fools. Or Christmas morning. It’s not cool when your doctor fancies himself a prankster and phones your wife to relay news to you that you have gonorrhea. Robert Pattinson is not constitutionally composed to exact revenge, so T-Pain is going to have to wait for karma to take a nasty bite out of his future. I wouldn’t stand too close to Suge Knight any time soon. Or ride a foreign ferry.

Photo Credit: Instagram