WNBA’s First Couple Arrested

Engaged WNBA players Brittney Griner and Glory Johnson were arrested in Phoenix over a domestic dispute after both sustained minor injuries around the 6’4″ mark. Britney hhad several small cuts and a bite wound. Johnson was rocking a busted lip. To be fair these injuries could have been sustained from an earlier love making session or a heated game of HORSE. It’s unclear why police decided to arrest the couple instead of just telling one to go cool off at the softball fields. Friends and family had trouble separating the two during their kerfuffle which is why I recommend keeping a tranquilizer gun around hormonal women who can dunk. Earlier this week Britney posted the following love note to Instagram. It’s unclear why things went south so fast and which one smiled at the waitress:

“EveryDay Every Second! I fall for you like I fell way back before I had the nerves to even approach you! My Queen My Rock My Universe!”

In a relationship you need one person with childhood issues who constantly flies off the handle and another one who’s into cars and doesn’t let shit bother them. Furthermore there needs to be a large disparity in physical strength so it’s not a fair fight and one can restrain the other when they’ve had too much chardonnay and you forgot an anniversary. I hope these two can make it work without installing an octagon in the garage. Lesbian relationships have their particular challenges. It’s hard to scissor in the bathroom.

Photo Credit: mcso.org