Emily Ratajkowski Doesn’t Need This

Proving that men have a poor sense of where they sit on the reproductive food chain, there’s a meme of ‘Emily Ratajkowski is a butter face’ going around Al Gore’s Internet. If you’re taking the time to criticize this model’s face, then you’re probably just three shades of fame away from inviting Diane Sawyer to see your hope chest filled with post-op dresses. You don’t visit the Taj Mahal to note its kitchen and bathrooms need updating. We live in a Yelp reviewers society. I just had my dick sucked. I would’ve given five stars if she could’ve hummed the baseline to By-Tor and The Snow Dog. You don’t deserve, Emily Ratajkowski. C’mon, mouse face, let’s blow this joint.

Photo Credit: Revolve Clothing