Neil Young Pulls Out

Neil Young has been making waves lately, leaving his wife of 36 years to pork Darryl Hannah because organic YOLO. It’s something you’ve always wanted to do, let the lawyers figure it out. I might make a run at Jolie when she’s nearing eighty and I’m still legally allowed behind the wheel of my Porsche. His wife should have let it slide. Be grateful anyone wants his rock star dick at this age. We’re way past being polite.

Young recently pulled his music from streaming audio services such as Spotify and iTunes because he says the quality sucks. This has nothing to do with Young being the owner of the Pono player, which retails for $399 and will be immediately stolen. It doesn’t compress music into mp3 form so you’re able to go blow your eardrums out on the treadmill. Sure I could tote a Studebaker turntable around with me in the name of purity. I’ve seen the hipsters at Starbucks. If you’re bumping Justin Bieber do you really want high quality? I’d be happy if the shit they played in bars was compressed into two ones and a zero and blasted out of a fucking body pillow. It sucks. You’ve got to admire Young’s integrity or his business acumen. They’re one in the same now days. The damage done.

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