Bill Murray Stands Accused

The girls with pay  for your own iPads at Jezebel wanted to remind everybody on the heels of the Very Murray Christmas special on Netflix that Bill Murray was once accused of beating his wife, by his wife, during their divorce proceedings. No crimes was ever charged or adjudicated. Mia Farrow rules apply to people you hate. Men. And that anorexic blond Republican chick on Fox.

JEZEBEL: Reminder: Your Celebrity Folk Hero Bill Murray Was Once Accused of Spousal Abuse 

Thanks for the timely reminder. I was about to marry him. Hillary Clinton wants to believe all rape claims de facto, because she missed that day at Yale when they taught Constitutional law.

Jezebel pulled up a bunch of quotes from people who know Murray calling him a major asshole. That’s certainly suspicious. Then they Googled ‘Bill Murray abuse’ and found 36 million results. The first one being the Jezebel story on Bill Murray being accused of abuse. I Googled ‘feminist bullshit’ and got nearly a million results. There’s definitely something there.

Cut to the fucking point, Jezebel. There’s a man out there you don’t like who got away with being a womanizing drunken louse and now young men look up to him and it burns you on the inside. Near the vagina you had ritualistically named after an Egyptian goddess in the meditation room at Soul Cycle. It’s okay to hate Bill Murray. Just fucking say, I hate Bill Murray. So much time saved on the other 2,000 words of bullshit. Now you can get to Whole Foods before the vegan muffins begin to sprout. ‘Lex Hates Women’, 440,000 results. Hangman is coming, mama.

Photo Credit: “A Very Murray Christmas” Netflix