Lea Michele’s Dead Boyfriend Would’ve Loved Her Current Boyfriend

You may recall two years ago when Dead Cory Monteith checked into a Canadian hotel which is both a literal account of his overdose death and now a handy euphemism. Lea Michele turned his passing into a series of weeping magazine pictorials, a pop dance album, and a small theme park in her backyard where she charged fans ten bucks to see her make out with a wax replica of her dead boyfriend. Everybody grieves differently.

Michele is convinced that Dead Cory Monteith would love her current boyfriend because Matthew Paetz is a good looking former male escort and bones her like an elderly woman who still has needs. You know how former boyfriends adore new boyfriends, especially from beyond the grave. Michele understands the backlash from her fans on getting back in the saddle, but she wishes they would consider this nonsense instead:

I don’t think anyone is really projecting hate, it is positive, it’s nothing so, so terrible but at the end of the day, we have to remember that what we put out there, it manifests and it creates energy and you should want to be the person that chooses to take that second to do something positive

Imagine that shit in a high pitched whine for two years and see if you’re not looking up hotel rooms in Vancouver on Expedia. Yes, I am dating Lea Michele. Give me a couple hours before you clean my room. Here’s a hundred for a tip. No, no particular reason.

Photo credit: FameFlynet