The Billboard Music Awards serve as a reminder that erhu plucked tunes over Chinese restaurant intercoms is not the world’s most annoying music. Teenaged girls like super shitty music. Followed closely by teenaged boys trying to get laid by teenaged girls. The result of which is Justin Bieber, Britney Spears, Rihanna, and one or more Jonas brother representing the heights of popular musical accomplishments. Madonna performed a tribute to Prince because she was drunk enough to take a stab at a honoring the one who walked among them with actual musical talent. The sole entertaining moment was watching Russell Wilson scramble to pretend his wife’s tits excited him. Stop holding your hands up in an obvious grasping motion and saying you can’t wait until you get home, we get it. You’re good at football and the rest shouldn’t matter.
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