I Wonder Who Won Wimbledon Again?

If you had money against the chick who has sixty percent more muscle mass than her closest competitor, don’t bother searching for your ticket. Being the physically biggest, strongest, and fastest doesn’t necessarily get you ahead in life, though in sports in turns out to be a sizable advantage.

Serena Williams dispatched some German chick in the Wimbledon finals with a combination of wicked volleys and a hypersonic scream that caused bless vessels to shatter throughout her opponent’s body. Williams took a scheduled dump of hex bolts and the cocks of three British men who lost a bar bet before joining her sister Venus to dominate the Wimbledon doubles title as well.

Both girls cried like Taylor Swift taking home the statuette at any pop music awards show. Are you serious? How did we even win this thing? Yes, we can put the royal box down now. You’re funny. Like we’re not bullet-proof.

_{Photo credit: Splash News}