Martin Shkreli Losing His Shit

Martin Shkreli owes $2.8 million in back taxes so the state of New York is pillaging his house for valuables. Luckily he owns a lot of shit that only closet gay pseudo intellectuals and rapists affiliated with Phil Spector or Bill Cosby are fond of. Jeff Koons, Joan Miro, Dustin Yellin, Damien Hirst. Few people with anything interesting to say know who these people are, but their art is worth a lot of money.

People who collect such art don’t care much for looking at it either, it’s a status thing. Some hobo who splashes buckets of paint on the wall with a faraway look in his eyes hit the jackpot. Not impressed. He’s currently awaiting trial for a multitude of financial crimes, and his bank balance should soon be down to zero. Somehow you always still get to keep a sick three bedroom house you paid for with other people’s money though, not sure where that’s written in the Constitution. Since he’s famous for being a cheating douchebag it seems unlikely he’ll rebound financially yet will probably eek out a living as a mid level consultant. Move to Russia, you’re considered good looking over there. 

_{Photo Credit: Twitter}