Janet Jackson Pushing Two-Fifty

September 9, 2016 | Uncategorized | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments

Janet Jackson is in seclusion at 250 pounds, having put on a dangerous one-hundred since needlessly becoming pregnant at fifty. This according to OK! magazine. Don’t be confused with the exclamation point. Dramatic punctuation remains a lackluster substitute for real reporting. Though everyone with a medical degree from an accredited institution sort of agrees that having a baby at fifty is somewhere between a bad idea and a horrible idea. Certainly a risky hobby in between repeated farewell tours.

As a woman you have a solid thirty year window to give birth to offspring. That’s a decent runway for planning and producing. You start using bleeding edge science to aid and abet your AARP reproductive dreams and you’re asking for trouble. Just because you can technically do something doesn’t mean you should. I can knit a coat out of captured rat baby skins. I choose not to. That’s a loose comparison.

HollywoodLife is running a poll as to whether or not it’s a good idea for Janet Jackson to be pregnant at fifty or if she’s going die and take her fetus with her to heaven to see her pedo brother. That seems a bit personal. Also tardy. I vote bad idea. Rip that baby from the womb or admit this poll was entirely gratuitous. It’s baffling how much inane gossip content women must consume to make up for not watching tons of porn.

Photo credit: Splash News

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