Charlize Theron hasn’t won many friends with her repeated social activist cries that hot women in cinema have trouble finding work. You can’t even win among other hot women with that strategy. Guess who your casting competition is? Angelina Jolie hates Theron for taking away her role in the upcoming Murder on the Orient Express remake. Also for adopting overseas black babies even more adorable than her own. Rescue babies are the new rescue dogs which were the new purse and shoes.
To prove her point that being super attractive in Hollywood only merits you Sean Penn peen, Theron had to put on thirty-five pounds for a comedic role as a hectored new mom in Tully, the comedy from Jason Reitman. I’m too tired to put comedy in quotes.
The fat pillow may have sufficed, but full De Niro still looks good on you. Way to go everywoman. Ashley Graham is in the bushes with a blow gun and a poisoned cheesecake. Women can’t win because they’re making up the rules as they go along. This is why the guy who calls fouls in pickup games is never invited back.
Photo Credit: Christian Dior J’adore