Jessica Zharnest and Lexi Fragola Dressed As Fuckboys For Halloween

A strong majority of major media outlet bloggers are young women. That makes it impossible to escape the barrage of feel good stories where Millennials are adulated for some messaging endeavor that before social media would’ve been maybe earned them a half-second nod. Now it’s a BuzzFeed incredulous headline backed by beaucoup Facebook promotional spending. 

Jessica Zharnest and Lexi Fragola are co-eds at the University of Connectitcut. On breaks from insane Paper Chase pre-law cram sessions, these girls take a ton of selfies and spend hours on social media and dating sites hording inappropriate or rude messages sent back to them by young men. They refer to these crude pussyhounds as “fuckboys”. The precise definition of a fuckboy isn’t fully explained but it seems to boil down to horny guys with no idea on how to get laid. Jessica and Lexi in low cut tank tops and short shorts ae there to trap them in their own shameful discourse. This is not the sexual equality women were fighting for decades ago. Those women really just wanted to fuck. This other nonsense seems super complicatd and far less fun.

Jessica and Lexi printed out the rudest and crudest messages messaged to them and paste them on oversized t-shirts they wore out on Halloween. No pants, naturally. You can’t call out the painful misogyny of fuckboys when you’re wearing pants. 

“Do you have a bed time?”
“Real shit day. Sorry. Long Story. Sorry if I can’t maintain an investment at this time.”
“Send nudes.”
“Come chill.”
“I am bad. I am a bad man.”
“I never said you were a slut chillax.”
“Hope you find someone better than me. I laugh cause there’s no way that’s possible. Goodbye. Your life was meaningless to me.”
“I’ve been single for seven months so why haven’t we fucked?”
“Hey can I have my shirt back?”

According to the future worldbeaters, tons of women on campus found their costumes hilarious and very relatable. Honestly, who doesn’t have a fuckboy problem these days? Jessica and Lexi also noted men coming up to them and apologizing for on occasion acting like total fuckboys. That account seems like a stretch. Unless those boys were merely saying what they thought would get them laid, which makes them whatever the much smarter version of a fuckboy is.

This entire escapde seems like the kind of thing that ought be run through the parent test. That’s where you hypnotize the unfortunate people underwriting your college partying and Snapchat years and ask them if they’re really proud of you for your feminist protest. Or, in the alternative, if they wish you’d shut your fucking trap and find a nice man because there’s no way you’re supporting yourself after college. Aren’t there any fuckboys with good jobs, dear? Just saying. College doesn’t last forever and you can’t wear Tinder come-on’s to the swing shift at Subway.

_{Photo Credit: Facebook}