Von Miller Being Extorted

In a not surprising development, Von Miller appears to like his women to be on the thick side. Miller met Elizabeth Ruiz while on vacation in Mexico. Ruiz is an American citizen, you fucking racists. Miller started shtupping her and she recorded at least one of the sessions on her cell phone. He then asked her to delete the video and she demanded $2.5 million or else she’d publicly release it. So, she’s not exactly marriage material.

Miller has filed suit against Ruiz, who probably has the shittiest lawyer of all time. It’s unclear how the legality of this works, but it appears to be against the law to release a porno of someone without their consent. Also, extortion is a crime. Plus, this just seems really fucked up. Clearly that counts for something.

The lesson to be learned here is don’t let sketchy whores you met in Cancun record you banging them. Nothing is sacred anymore. Stop fucking with the lights on, E! needs plenty of content. Also, pick the Broncos D in your fantasy league, this dude’s got a lot of aggression built up. 

_{Photo Credit: Instagram}