Ashley Graham Baywatch XL

Like oversized sunglasses on a butter-face or a guys with small dicks working out topless. Crutches exist for a reason. It’s easy to lament magazine airbrushing. It’s less easy to admit you want it back pronto.

Ashley Graham looks as amazing as definitively overweight can look in magazine photos. You start catching the cellulite activist behind the scenes in a Baywatch swimsuit and you’re playing with visual fire. Flashbacks to German hausfraus nude sunbathing on the beaches of Spain ensue. Graham claims she was born this way. I’d like to see the baby pictures. Do they make diapers in that size?

We’re currently absorbed in a body shaming-body positive cycle of circular logic that excludes the existence of any middle ground. Height-weight proportionate is nothing more than a convenient lie on dating sites. Speaking to an anorexic woman about alternatives leads to her declaration that she doesn’t want to be fat and the fat women claims the only available alternative is to stave herself. What happened to jogging and avoiding that second slice of pie? You shouldn’t require the Jaws of Life to remove a wedgie.

Pull out the old Super 8 movies. Nobody was fat, save for Uncle Sal who you knew mostly from stories about what a shame it was he left us so early. Certainly I’ll tug one out to the finished photos. I’m not without sympathies.

_{Photo Credit: FameFlyNet}