Porn Star Becomes Church Pastor

Nadia Hilton burst onto the porn scene when Paris Hilton was inexplicably popular. The two do look somewhat alike, although Paris Hilton is extremely generic looking so it’s not that remarkable. While Paris did indeed have her tits done she stopped well short of the triple D freak show mark set by Nadia Hilton. It worked for her, and she appeared in over 100 pornos, most of which were filmed fairly recently but still look oddly dated.

During this time Nadia developed a severe drinking problem to cope with the pain of being sexually abused as a child. Between shooting fuck scenes and guzzling vodka, Nadia acted as a single mother to her daughter as a hobby. Eventually she got sick of nursing the rug burns and visited her sister’s church. Because she’s clearly a psychotic nymphomaniac, she immediately started fucking the pastor, who goes by simply David. I wouldn’t want my name getting out there either. 

She found Jesus, reverted back to her given name of Crystal Bassette, and married David. They are now co-pastors of a church called New Beginnings Christian Life. It’s unclear if all of the members are reformed porn stars, or if lonely horny guys show up during the NFL offseason to watch a chick with tits the size of punch bowls give a sermon. Crystal seems at peace with herself, until she falls off the wagon and fucks David’s entire youth group: 

“What I would like people to take away from us is that God can forgive you no matter what past you come from. I hope it encourages everybody else to do the same, to realize that money and fame isn’t what it’s about. I look back at my past now and you know I can’t say that I really regret anything because it has made me who I am today.”

You think you were famous? You don’t regret getting herpes? David, clearly this is the most interesting thing that’s ever happened to you, but get out while you can. If your wife doesn’t regret filming Big Tit Anal Whores 3, Double Air Bags 23, Lex Steele XXX 3, and Butt Buffet, she’s not a keeper. It’s good that she’s bettering herself, but you’re not ready for this kind of heat.

If you’re ever in upstate New York and want some amazing material for a documentary, by all means visit this church and bring your copy of All Ditz and Jumbo Tits 4, perhaps Crystal will sign it. She has no regrets. 

_{Photo Credit: PornHub}