Kim Kardashian Barren

Ever since Khloe made Vegetative Lamar annul their annulment in a Cedars-Sinai ICU, the Kardashian’s have been medically cursed. The Old Testament God is vengeful. Don’t overtly break commandments in the Spielberg wing.

Kim Kardashian has two invented storylines for the current season of the family reality series. First, the Paris hotel invasion robbery left her wanting to hide from the world not including the field production team that shoots her sixteen hours a day from dump til dusk. Second, she wants to have a baby but her womb is broken. There’s never been a solid explanation as to why 97% of women on reality shows suffer from fertility issues. Erin Brockovich might spend some time digging.

Kardashian expressed her willingness to risk death from surgery to repair a gaping hole in her reproductive system, and not the one the a half dozen rappers brag about knowing. Her uterus needed new drywall. She chose surgery because she wanted her two children to know a third. Also, if she died, Kanye would finally have to spend time with the kids. At least at the funeral.

Based on a sensationally lit hospital room recovery scene, Kim Kardashian’s surgery did not go well. She got an emergency catheter rummaged up her urethra when her urine started shooting about like a feral tomcat marking turf. The doctors informed her that the surgery could not repair the open Stargate in her womb. Unless there’s some spectacular reversal of fortune, say around the last episode of the season, Kim Kardashian will no longer be making babies. 

The impact on the population of mulatto showpiece children swaddled in gold by the foot is profound. There are many multiple times more blue whales in the world than bastard Kardashian babies, but people only cry for the whales. Khloe hasn’t started yet but she might be a man. This could be it for the Kardashian line. With drugs and suicide and self-injected typhus, the attrition rate could be high. Post a casting call for short stacked Armenian girls who know only a little about the Turkish genocide. The ranks must be refilled. There’s no way the viewers take up a healthy hobby.

_{Photo credit: E!}

_{Photo Credit: Splash News}