Kylie Jenner Docu-Series Light on the Docu (VIDEO)

To fill in the summer gap where her gay Decathlete dad’s show used to run, Kylie Jenner’s receiving her own vacation time series on E!, where if it ain’t Kardashian, it ain’t making money.

Life of Kylie is being promoted as a ‘docu-series’. It’s unclear how any of the content is remotely different from the identical reality television bogus production protocols, but perhaps this puts Life of Kylie in official contention against four Syrian refugee short forms at the ’18 Oscars. The promo largely reveals a series that will be chock full of images of Kylie’s licensed merchandised lines. The promo itself is packaged to look like her lip gloss line. Laugh now, her rainbow party perfect lips make tens of millions.

The premise of this Kylie show is that it’s truly going behind the scene to show you the real Kylie Jenner. If you’ve ever heard anybody ask for that, raise your hand. Hot red lipstick crop top whore Kylie Jenner on the other has a room full of cocked hands.

“When you grow up on camera, everybody feels like they know you, but they don’t. Nobody has a perfect life. Now I can find what really is going to make me happy. There’s an image that I have to keep up with, then there’s me: Kylie.”

Whoever wrote that for Kylie to attempt to voice over ought consider the origin of the cliche. That ‘growing up on camera’ bit comes from kid actors who grew up on scripted television shows playing characters. You might be shocked to learn they are not in fact at all like the characters they portrayed on television.

In contrast, you specifically have spent the last ten years on an unscripted show with the premise that this is the real you. Also, the ten thousand ‘real you’ social media posts and pictures and videos. Teenaged girls have spent more time with the real you than their own family. They surely think they know you. Unless that part wasn’t true and now the new true stuff is true. Be fortunate your fans have no time for logic what with all their Kylie lip gloss parties.

I miss the summers when your tranny dad used to get drunk on a bus and intermittently giggle about dildos and cry over high risk teens. Also, I miss the Osmonds.